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A long time ago, when I was young & stupid, I had a definite vision of who I was going to be & what I was going to do.  Mostly, I wanted to do great things…very specific great things that would make a big difference in the world.

As a young man, I had laser-like focus on the goals I was chasing.  I knew exactly what I wanted to do…what GOD wanted me to do…to change the world and make a name for myself.  There were people in my life in those years who were like superheroes to me, and I wanted to be just like them.  I set out to master the skills & traits of the young men I admired most, working hard to mimic their success.  In many ways, this worked well for me for several years; but eventually I began to struggle.  We all struggle with lots of things, and some of those struggles define ages of our lives and the lessons we fight to learn for the future.  There were several years in my past when, although many aspects of life & ministry were falling into place wonderfully, I wasn’t experiencing the dream I had chased, and was feeling like I was wearing someone else’s shoes.

I’ve gone through “identity crisis” a few times….it’s incredibly painful…but I’ve learned that God can be trusted.  I’m still learning to trust that God loves me indelibly and is proud of me even though I can’t change the world or be like those superheroes of my past.  I can just be me, and depend on Him that it’s enough.  He can be trusted with my reputation and fears.  He can be trusted to run my life, to interpret my past and teach me about my future.

Trusting God with one’s identity is a great challenge.  There are lots of loud voices vying for attention, but the One who knit me together body & soul still speaks & leads.  Today, I’m thankful that God still speaks, even though it’s 30 years later and I’m still stupid.  His voice is clear and terrible and beautiful when I remove distractions and sit with Him alone with my Bible in the woods.  This is part of what He told me this morning at Cooper Mountain Nature Park while I sat there in the stillness of the bright morning dew…listening.

I hope you can experience this too…He’s there waiting.

About 2-years ago, Mr. & Mrs. Rader’s healthy, school-aged daughter Cali became seriously ill with an infection to the brain called viral encephalitis.  Since then, she has had a very difficult time, and has been at Providence Child Center in Portland, slowly recovering ever since.  This March, the Raders were informed that Cali would likely be ready to transition back home later this year.  She has reached the point where she can propel her wheelchair on her own and is interacting with others, among other signs of recovery.  The trouble is that the Rader home is not ready, having been built in 1954.  The Raders decided that they need to do whatever it takes to transform their home into compliance with ADA requirements, and have embarked on a massive addition project.  Mr. Rader is acting as the “general contractor” and builder, although he works full-time in an unrelated trade and has never done anything like this.  He has successfully obtained permits, redone the septic system, and recently finished the foundations with the help of Cali’s uncle (a contractor), friends & family members.  Their goal is to “dry-in” the addition before the rainy season kicks in mid-October.  Big Doug and I visited Roger in July, and he was totally overwhelmed and needing support.  We were so moved by the magnitude of the project, and desire to help them bring their daughter home, that we took the bull by the horns and scheduled to take over the framing portion of the project….praying that God would supply skilled volunteers for this big job, mainly from their church family at Newberg Christian Church (NCC).  What none of us knew at the time was that wheels of support were also spinning with NCC.

After finishing up the Homeless Liaison Project in Beaverton on Aug.31 I set my sights on the Rader project, which was supposed to start in less than 2 weeks.  I had conversations with senior pastor David Case, as well as service project coordinator Meredith Dougherty.  I was shocked to hear that over 100 volunteers, including many licensed contractors and trades professionals, had signed up to not just help….but to take it over!  They were completely overwhelmed by people offering to volunteer, donate materials & labor, and by contractors stepping up to oversee the process.  Have you ever been really excited to do something special for someone, only to find out that they or someone else had already done it?  It kind of takes the wind out of your sails…but this was different…this puts wind INTO my sails!  What an amazing example of what the local church is all about!  Meredith asked me if I was OK with them taking it over without Catalyst’s help, and I explained how excited I was that they were…not only that, but the weekend we had set aside for the Rader project can be used to assist yet another family in need instead.

I work with churches all the time to pull off big projects for people in need, and I’ve rarely seen the magnitude of committed care that NCC is bringing to bear on behalf of this family.  I’m truly amazed and inspired.  Way to go, Newberg Christian Church!

BTW, a “Go Fund Me” page has been created to help the Raders with material costs.  If you are interested in supporting this project with funding, visit www.gofundme.com/BringCaliHome

This morning I read the 2nd & 3rd chapters of the last book in the Bible.  Revelation is, in the minds of most people I’ve encountered in over 20 years of ministry, a very weird & crazy book!  The prophecies and symbolic imagery can be really confusing and controversial.  Often, when people read things in the Bible that are confusing and controversial, they either ignore those parts or they interpret them according to their own preconceived opinions.  This is always dangerous to the cause of truth, because we humans are so easily swayed in our opinions by the lure of compromise.

Compromise has to do with efforts to make peace between two opposing loyalties.  In the sense of our relationship with God, it most often has to do with trying to control the rule of God’s Kingdom in our lives so that it doesn’t negatively impact our relationship with the world we live in….or the things that give us pleasure.  All throughout the scriptural history of God’s relationships with people, compromise is the evidence of betrayal of our allegiance to God as Lord.  We tend to WANT God for the things He can give us, but AVOID Him for the things He requires us to do, or not do, for Him that we think will “spoil our fun.”  As followers of Jesus, any time we find ourselves holding onto something that doesn’t please God…trying to keep it away from His rule in our lives…we end up suffering the consequences of compromise.  This isn’t because God is against us….but because He is FOR US, and is molding us into the image He created us for.

The messages given by Jesus to the 7 churches named in Revelation 2-3 are not confusing at all, but they are definitely controversial and challenging to us still today:

• Make “Seeking God” the first priority in your life
• Stay away from sexual immorality and worship of other gods
• Persevere and pray when you are ridiculed and marginalized for your faith
• Love and serve others in the Church and in the world
• Find peace in the hope we have in Christ’s coming return, not in the pleasures of this world

So often, followers of Jesus fall into one of two categories… Those who exert for social justice, and those who emphasize moral correctness. The Lord embodies both, and calls us to be the same.  James 1:27 – “Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you.”

I was really encouraged and inspired by one of our volunteers last week.  Carol came out to help with yard work at the Kepler Project about 2 weeks ago, spending most of the day with almost 40 other volunteers doing various tasks in the weekend heat wave – It was 97-degrees that day.

That evening, she went to an artisan’s fair at McMenamin’s Edgefield in Troutdale.  She shared her story of the project, the people, and the work of Catalyst, with an artist named Tom.  He was so inspired by her story that he gave her this beautiful “helping hands” piece he created, donating it to Catalyst for the ways we reach out our hands to help others in need.  She delivered the gift to me last week, and we talked about how important and powerful it is to share God’s love with others through our HANDS.

With our hands we create, we work, we put food & drink into our mouths, we clean, we give comfort, we brush our teeth, we drive…the list goes on & on.  Our hands also bear the marks & wrinkles of their wear & tear, as well as scars from times we have suffered.  I was pondering this, and remembered how essential it was to Doubting Thomas to see the nail-holes in Christ’s hands so that he could believe.  It’s an interesting correlation that, when we suffer on behalf of others, and bear their burdens with our hands, we demonstrate the living presence of Jesus in the world…often in ways that remove barriers and inspire people to believe.

As I continue my year-long challenge of reading of the entire Bible, this morning I’m struck by a common theme: The repeating pattern of those who witness and experience God’s miraculous work to take Him for granted and fall away from Him.  I’d like to think that I’m different, better than those stupid people…but I’ve walked with the Lord long enough, and fallen into many of the same traps, enough to admit the truth that I am not.

All throughout the history of God’s chosen people in the Old Testament, the Hebrews seemed to go through endless pendulum swings of rebellion, consequences, repentance, forgiveness, blessing, apathy, and back to rebellion.  God’s stubborn love, and His dedication to His covenant promises, stands out like a beacon of hope throughout history…in spite of the peoples’ repeated inability to hold onto it.  I’m so thankful for the forgiveness we have in Jesus, which over and over covers my inadequacies and rebellions….and gives me new opportunities to walk with Him.

His call to us to continue steadfastly in Him remains today:

“See to it, brothers and sisters, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called “Today,” so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. We have come to share in Christ, if indeed we hold our original conviction firmly to the very end. As has just been said:

‘Today, if you hear his voice,
    do not harden your hearts
    as you did in the rebellion.’”

(Hebrews 3:12-15)

I thought it would be good to record some of my Facebook posts from right after the US Supreme Court ruled to overturn gay marriage bans in American states.  This has become a very hot topic, and here’s where I land on it.  The comments were abundant, and all over the map.

June 27

June 28

The greatest person is the one who dies empty-handed, leaving behind a trail of blessings.

Jesus said, “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.  For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” (Matthew 6:19-21)

Some days, I cannot manufacture peace inside of me.  It’s not totally a choice, is it?  One cannot simply un-feel feelings.  They are often not under our control.  Sure, we can divert and distract our minds…kind of like parents do when re-focusing a child…but the feelings just get covered over for a while.  We can also hide emotions behind a veneer of something else.  The only thing I’ve ever found that has power to unlock and remove unwanted feelings of anger, fear, sadness, depression, etc., is God.  He has what we do not….what we need…and we were designed to live in constant communication with Him.  And once that communication is firmly established, His peace takes root.  Most of the time, when I’m struggling inside, the answer I need is not really about the problem I’m wrestling with….but about my desperate need at that moment for God’s perspective.  I need to remember who I am….or better, Whose I Am.

We can come closer to God in many ways, but there’s nothing quite like prayer & meditation. Taking a time-out from the noise & responsibilities of life in order to get our bearings…reset our compass…re-surrender control our lives to God. Here’s some good advice to live by, found in Philippians 4:6-8…

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you can experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. 

And 1 Peter 5:7…
Cast all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you.

OK, I think sports are cool and fun and all that, but I saw the dumbest thing and just had to say something.  Apparently some famous baseball player guy got himself kicked-out of a major league game last night on account of a questionable “strike” call by the ump.  The guy was literally acting like a 7-year-old child…and then his old-guy manager came out of the dugout to defend his tantruming player by jumping up and down, screaming in the ump’s face, and kicking dirt.  I literally laughed out loud at the stupidity of the whole thing.  He & the ump went at it like gorillas fighting for turf.  It’s a frickin’ game!

Now, there is a time and place to get worked up, for sure….like when someone’s threatening my family, or abusing a child, or stealing from an old lady.  As a society, sometimes I think we’ve lost perspective about what’s truly important.