This morning God is teaching me things – for me and perhaps for you…
Every month, I try to dedicate a day to fasting & prayer. I say ‘try’ because some months it simply doesn’t happen. But when it does, It’s a way of quieting the pace of what we would normally associate with working, but not the same as a day off. A day off is for resting the mind and will from effort…allowing oneself to just go numb & dumb for awhile…or it’s for grocery shopping & lawn mowing, etc. This is very different, because although it does not resemble productive work, it is. In fact, more of God’s activity is advanced in my life through these prayer outings than just about anything else I ever do. They help me to hear His voice more clearly. Prayer & fasting is a spiritual discipline we see throughout the history of those who seek to follow Jesus…it’s a practice that has unearthed treasures and deeply impacted my relationship with God. I highly recommend it.
Anyway, this morning I started like I usually do, in Bible study & prayer. I’m on the tail-end of a year-long reading through the entire Bible, and am currently in the Old Testament book of Hosea. He was a prophet during the time in Israel’s history just before they were overthrown and taken into captivity by foreign armies. At that time, Israel was God’s chosen people to demonstrate His presence to a deeply corrupted world. Hosea was God’s mouthpiece to pronounce His judgement against Israel because they were totally blowing it – disregarding the commands and ways of their Heavenly King, doing whatever they wanted, and worshipping false gods. I was struck by how far the nation of God’s people had gone from Him, and was reflecting on the sinfulness in my own life as well as people I love. Scripture says that the things written in the past are there as examples & warnings for us…like guardrails or signposts. As I sat reflecting & praying for myself and others, my mood was morose and needy of God’s encouragement. He is quite alive and well, and abundantly able to provide for our needs…emotional included. However, He was silent.
After getting bundling-up for what I thought was going to be a frigid hike in the woods (where I often go for long prayer walks) I got in my frost-encrusted car and felt compelled to sit there while the windows de-frosted. It was 28-degrees this morning. As I sat gazing at the ice patterns on the other side of the glass, and the defroster air began heating up, the bottom of the windshield began to thaw. It was a very slow process, but I could just discern the movement of the thaw lines working their way upward and outward, turning the hardened, opaque shield into clear rivulets of falling water inside the circles created by the heat. To me, this was a picture of how the truth & love of God slowly softens & enlightens us when we get stuck…frozen & bound-up by the troubles & evils of this world. This is the constant consequence of being a fallen being in a fallen world, and we need to come to Him constantly to be released from the lies and hurts that freeze on our souls. As I was thinking about this first lesson, something happened.
I was startled by a “crack!” At first I had no idea what had happened, but then I saw the fracture line growing outward from the center of the windshield where a loose rock on the freeway had hit last week. Apparently, the combination of the cold air outside and the now-hot air from the defroster put pressure against the weakened area caused by the rock. I literally watched the white line extend inch-by-inch until it reached almost to the end of the passenger side of the windshield…then, suddenly, the same thing happened on the driver’s side. A new fissure appeared and extended to the left before my eyes. I immediately recognized that I needed to get this dangerous thing fixed ASAP, and I’m thankful this happened with me rather than my son who’s about to get his driver’s license! Then the realization hit of what a perfect object lesson this was for the effect of sin in our lives…and its interaction with the presence of God.
Sin is like that initial rock hitting my windshield…not in how it wasn’t my fault, but in the affect it had. Sin creates a weak spot, a chink in the armor, a little bastion of defiant independence from the reign of God in us. We all have them….many of them…and they screw up our connection with God. His love for us, and His pursuit of us, are not lessened by the dents & cracks in us…but those lesions certainly obstruct our vision of Him. Untended, they also tend to get worse with exposure to time, the elements, and even His efforts to reach out to us. Although we tend to chase after other remedies (gods), only He can repair our damaged souls. This takes time, attention, and priority…but we’re often unwilling to make the time, give Him undivided attention, or make choices that prioritize His will in our lives. Our God-given nature is to walk through life dependent on Him, but our fallen nature is to seek independence from Him. Expressions of self-determination and defiance against our Heavenly Father are what the Bible calls “sin”…it literally means “missing the mark.” Rebellion against Him, and neglect of relationship with Him, allow cracks to get bigger and multiply, until ultimately our vision of reality is obscured and we are in danger of falling shards. He is the one who repairs, our role is to trust and obey.
“So the trouble is not with God’s law, for it is spiritual and good. The trouble is with me, for I am all too human, a slave to sin. I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate. But if I know that what I am doing is wrong, this shows that I agree that the law is good. So I am not the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.
And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. I want to do what is right, but I can’t. I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway. But if I do what I don’t want to do, I am not really the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it. I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. I love God’s law with all my heart. But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin. So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.” (Romans 7:14-8:2)
I should have gone to get my windshield repaired last week, but I didn’t think it was a big deal. Apparently, I was wrong. It’s always better to do the right thing earlier, isn’t it? What could have been a minor repair turned into a complete replacement. In any case, thank God.
